Children make messes. Husband’s make messes.

Let’s be honest, we make messes.

We go throughout our days just trying to cram everything in and inevitably, something, somewhere has to take a backseat or we’ll go insane. I don’t know about you, although if you’re reading this post, maybe I do, when life gets busy, the state of my home tends to go on the back burner.

Who’s got time to clean and organize when life is going by and as soon as a mess is cleaned up, another one is made?

It can feel like an endless cycle of frustration and guilt for not having things the way you want them, or feel like they should be.

Okay, you must likely don’t have a lot of time- I don’t, I’m on a timer right now before Hayden has to be put down so let’s get right to the point. Those five promised tips that keep my house in not just a livable, but enjoyable state. (I know, right? Who knew?)

One QUICK tip before I get those out there is that you don’t have to do all of these yourself. In fact you shouldn’t have to. Unless you’re single and without a roommate, I can’t help you there. But if you live in a household with another human then you absolutely shouldn’t be doing everything all the time. As a stay-at-home-mom I tend to take on the majority of the cleaning tasks, which is totally fine with me. But there are tasks I ask my husband to assist me with and ya better believe once Hayden’s old enough to understand, he’s going to be chipping in too. All the responsibilities do not have to fall on your shoulders. Ok, ‘nuff said. Here’s my tips.

ONE : Don’t just shop & drop.

Grocery shopping is the bane of my existence. I can’t not do it and with a child, it’s a pain. This is one of the tasks I’ve handed off to Dustin and it’s his weekly thing. He goes child-free and I stay home. Plus, he shops on a budget far better than I do. As soon as he is home we clean out the fridge and get rid of any food that’s gone bad. I wipe down the shelves, straighten up anything that needs straightening and then the new food goes in. Older, but not yet expired food heads to the front so that everything gets eaten. I also prep our produce. I wash any fruits & veggies that aren’t in sealed packages for a specific meal and then I cut them up and put them in reusable containers. This ensures that everything gets eaten, we waste less and I know what we have in our fridge for the days I don’t plan out meals. (5 days planned, 2 days off for leftovers/family meals/outings/whatever.) Doing groceries this way means that I don’t have to take hours to clean my fridge every 6 months and gag at the grossness and wasted food is one less thing I have to worry about.

TWO : Do a daily reset.

You may have heard of this if you’ve ever stumbled upon organizing TikTok- yes that is my guilty pleasure. I LOVE my daily resets. I actually have done them long before I heard it from anyone else. A daily reset means that you do a quick speed clean and tidy any small project up at the end of the day so that you can start on a clean slate the next day. This can mean whatever you want it to mean! Some people it means they have all laundry, dishes and messes cleaned up at the end of the night. For me it means that I straighten up my living room, i.e, folding blankets, straightening cushions, putting toys away and taking care of any trash and dishes. I also make sure any laundry is picked up throughout the house and that all food in the kitchen is put away. Personally I don’t do the dishes and laundry because that’s a lot of work at the end of the night and I want to be present with my family and I have to put Hayden to bed and have a moment to myself. I choose to do my laundry and dishes in the morning when Dustin is at work and Hayden is napping. I don’t feel overwhelmed or guilty going to sleep with dishes in the sink because I know they’re going to get done first thing in the morning and if they do happen to get done the night before, it’s one less thing I have to do the next day! Whatever a daily reset means to you, it could literally be as simple as just picking up any towels and straightening your shower curtain- do it. It’s worth it and it makes even a messy house feel way less overwhelming. By the way, I don’t let this take more than 10 minutes. If you’re easily distracted, recruit the whole family to do a 10 minute speed clean of their personal space and set a timer. It will make a world of difference.

THREE : Find ways to make tasks you hate enjoyable.

Okay so who really actually likes to clean? Don’t get me wrong, I find it very satisfying and my mental health is much better when my space is clean, but actually getting there is a pain. Rather than sit unhappily in a messy space that stressed me and Dustin out- I chose to get over it and find a way to make it fun and enjoyable. For dishes and laundry I put “FRIENDS” on via my phone and I’ll watch/listen as I fold and wash. For sweeping, mopping or scrubbing I put on a good playlist and get as much done while music on. Anything to distract from the silence and thinking about how much you don’t enjoy that task will help. You could also use the speed cleaning tip I talked about above to make every task you do a bit better.

FOUR : Keep up with the mess.

I know, it sounds easier than it is. But seriously, get a cleaning schedule. Between the daily reset and dedicating each day to do a little bit of the cleaning, you will be able to enjoy more time with your family and doing the things you love and less time on your weekends stressing about needing to clean or dedicating your whole day to it. Plus you will be less stressed throughout your week because you’ll just be maintaining a clean space rather than trying to deal with a major mess. If you need a cleaning schedule or at least ideas, check out my post on it!

FIVE : Make your bed.

I know, I know, such a mom thing to say. I seriously detested making my bed for the first 21 years of my life. I’m serious, it wasn’t until three months ago when I finally decided that I needed to start making my bed. You know what triggered it? Buying three decorative pillows to make it pretty. I’m not kidding. One day we were buying pillows at Dirt Cheap and the next I was making my bed like freaking Martha Stewart. Tucked corners and all. It sounds annoying but it takes less than 2 minutes and whenever I walk into my room I don’t feel stressed out about a mess of sheets and pillows and blankets. AND- it takes effort to get back in bed. As someone who struggles with depression if my bed is open and available to me, you best believe I’ll be in it. That leads to a deeper depression and sense of failure and I’ll end up in bed for days. It’s also way more tempting to work in bed when it looks all cozy and comfy. It was a habit I had to force myself to start/I wanted to see my pretty pillows and now it’s a regular thing. Everyday, other than the occasional day on the weekend to wash sheets and let it air out, it’s made and it has made the world of difference. Plus it makes you feel accomplished and like you can tackle anything. Try it!

SIX : Don’t be lazy.

Rude. I know. But this one will bleed into every part of your life if you let it. Don’t just set things down, set them down where they go. If you’ve got it in your hand and already have to set it down, walk the ten extra steps to put it in its place. If you’re doing a task, finish it. There’s nothing that important, other than saving someone from their death, that can’t wait the two more minutes it’ll take you to finish a task. Don’t start a task if you can’t finish it and look for time you can do tasks. Have an extra five minutes before you actually have to be on the road for work? Collect all the trash in the house, replace the bags and take it out with you as you go to your car. Have a thirty minute lunch break at home but you only need ten of it to eat? Take the other twenty minutes and fold laundry while you watch a show. We all need less time scrolling anyways. So rather than look through the same Facebook feed you’ve been scrolling through for the last twenty minutes, get up and do a task or two that will make your life a little bit easier and a little bit less cluttered.

Establishing these habits and sticking with them may sound overwhelming. I get it. So make a list of habits you want to start and focus on one for a few days or weeks until you get it. Then add another one and keep adding. It’ll eventually turn into a new lifestyle where you’re a little bit less stressed and your house is a little more clean. It’s a win-win for everyone. Bonus tip: write the list of tasks that have to be done to maintain your house and post it on the fridge. When you have a free second or someone in your house has a moment or says something along the lines of “I’m bored”, send them to the fridge to check off the next task. At the end of the week if there are any tasks left, do a speed clean and wipe the slate fresh for the new week.

I hope this was helpful. You’ve got this, I believe in you!

xoxo - Ry