Money, it's such a pain, right?

There's never quite enough or when there is, it's tempting to spend or if you're like my husband, invest it all.

For 21 and 23 we're not doing too bad, it just always feels like we're playing a game of catch up. Ya know, rebuilding the emergency fund after buying a house and car. Now embarking on paying off the mortgage, budgeting for groceries and trying to set aside some for fun. Oh and, of course, investing for our future and building a retirement fund.

It's exhausting and honestly, adding a baby into the mix is going to be interesting. Throwing away money on diapers every month and then adding in more food and clothes, it's going to take a toll. I know, I could do cloth diapers but I just can't get on board with it. I'm doing my best to help the environment with doing bamboo compostable disposables without any chemicals in them, but I just can't handle cloth right now. Anyways, there's that to add to the ever-tightening budget and then there's the matter of actually managing to work with a baby. I'm not sure exactly how it's all going to work. Kinda scary if you think about it. I should've listened to everyone who told me to never grow up.

I'm a natural planner and I am totally a type-a personality so I like for things to run smoothly and make sense on paper. But that doesn't always translate to real life. Sometimes life says “Hey! Let me toss you $500... but let's not stop there, here's a $700 car repair!”. Ya know? The struggle is real.

But it's life and for the most part, life is good, so I just take it as it goes and trust that God's going to provide. He always does.

As much as I am a type-a planner, I’ve had to learn to trust God with the outcome and the provisions.

From my life decisions you probably wouldn’t think that I am actually much of a planner. In fact, you’d probably think I’m a bit reckless. There’s been times I think I’m being reckless, but when God calls me into something, I’m not going to say no. Because really, even though I can’t see the plan, I know He can and I have to trust that His plan is bigger and better than mine could ever be. I don’t want to live my life never experiencing it to the full because I was too afraid that I may fall off the edge or flat on my face.

For instance, when I moved to Nashville at 18 I did not have a plan. Seriously, that was the first most spontaneous thing I've EVER done in my life. I actually had attempted to move here six months earlier with a big plan and it completely fell through. But May rolled around and all of the sudden I decided I was just going to do it. I didn't have a job, a place to live, much of a savings at all (like literally I think I had $1200 the day I moved) and had zero plan. But I was going to do it anyways. God had given me the urge and the nudge and I knew He was calling me to Nashville, at least temporarily (or so I thought). That week someone gave me a book, 100 Days to Brave where author Annie Downs literally talked about her journey of stepping out in faith and moving.. to NASHVILLE. It was a beautiful confirmation. The day I decided that I was going to move I posted in a few Facebook groups a girl who I had met a few months earlier at a writer's retreat added me to and I instantly had a hit. My roommate messaged me, we Facetimed that day and I decided I was going to move July 1st. Next up I needed to get a job and I put out a post in another Facebook group that I needed a freelance gig or at least an idea and a girl reached out to me and asked if I'd train her team on how to effectively use social media to grow their following and engagement levels. At the time Instagram was a really great place to be and I knew exactly what I needed to do and so a week later I just started. And that grew and grew and eventually I had over ten part time clients. I can't explain it, but on July 1st, 2018, with less than $1500 in my bank account, I was living in Nashville. It wasn't the perfect time or the perfect circumstances, but I did it.

Fast forward a few months and Dustin and I were dating.

We had only been dating a few months when we decided to get married. A lot of people told us we needed to wait. My friends thought I had actually lost my mind, especially since he hadn't even met my friends or family back in Michigan yet and he was my first official boyfriend. And did I mention we were 18 and 21 and literally had only met a few months before? That being said, we both felt strongly that we were supposed to get married and that regardless of our age, finances, living situation and the amount of time that we had been dating that it was the right thing to do. So we went for it and here we are over two years later, still going strong.

Just before our first wedding anniversary we found out we were expecting.

A baby boy, due the week of Thanksgiving. Again, people told us we should've waited. We were told that we weren't financially stable enough, that we shouldn't have a baby when we were still living with Nanny (although we did such to help out the family after his grandfather passed away), that we should've spent more time on our *rushed* marriage, that we needed to have traveled and established careers. But ya know, we both really wanted to have kids young and even though it went against all the things that society said we should or shouldn't do, we went for it and God decided to give us a baby. And here we are with a baby boy coming any day now.

Then there's the whole “we bought a house” thing last month.

We're young. We probably should've started with a starter apartment or rented according to society's standards. We probably should have spent money traveling and not tying ourselves down and all that jazz. But we felt like God was calling us to buy and even after attempting to rent at several places, it literally was just not going to happen. Instead we somehow ended up getting a home loan at one of the lowest interest rates ever recorded and we got a beautiful restored home in a promising area, not far from family. We didn't think any of it was going to work out and yet it did, a whole eight days earlier than we thought it would based on our paperwork.

So what's my point? Stop waiting.

Stop worrying about how and when something is going to happen.

Stop overthinking the how and enjoy the process.

You never know where life is going to take you or when your life is going to be over. If you wait to do everything you're going to be waiting forever.

Sometimes it's not the right time and that's okay, listen to the Holy Spirit/your intuition and take things one day at a time. If you feel ready in your spirit to do something, go for it. Because listen. It will never be the right or perfect time. There will always be something else you need to save for, pay off or buy. There will always be that “what if”. There will always be something else you could be doing or someone else you could be with. There will always be questions and stares and judgmental people. But what matters in the end is if you do what you're supposed to do for your life. No amount of societal expectations can govern or dictate how your life is supposed to go.

Now obviously don't be stupid and reckless and spend all of your money and leave yourself homeless or in deep debt. But don't be afraid to take risks because you never know if you'll have the opportunity to take that risk tomorrow. It may be too late.

What are you waiting for?

Do the dang thing.

xoxo – Ry