Riley Sandrell

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You Are Not Failing

Today I saw a quote that said:

“Reminder: You are not failing just because today is difficult.”

– @hertrueworth

I'm not sure who needs to hear this, I'm not even sure when I'm posting this, so if you see it, you'll know it was meant for you.

You, my love, you're not failing.

A hard moment is only that, a moment.

A hard hour is only that, an hour.

A hard day is only that, a day.

I know we are caught in the paradox that we are not guaranteed tomorrow so live it up today, but at the same time that's just not realistic for the day to day life and that's ok. This hard moment, day, hour, maybe even week, month or year that you're experiencing does not take away from all of the good moments.

Your worth is not dependent on what you accomplish in a day.

Your worth is not dependent on your circumstances.

Your worth is not dependent on your emotions and reactions.

I know you want to do it all and be it all but you must stop putting so much pressure on yourself. No one is capable of meeting the standards you are setting for yourself. The standards on social media, they're not real. It's fake. It's staged. It's marketing to get you to buy into a lifestyle that nobody can truly have.

The system is set up to make you feel like you're failing so that you'll buy all of the products and the books that promise to transform you into someone who is incapable of failing. But it's a hoax.

The only thing you're failing at is trusting the process and trusting in the fact that you don't have to have it all figured out.

We must stop setting such ridiculously high standards for ourselves that nobody is capable of achieving.

The perfect house is not achievable.

The perfect marriage is not achievable.

The perfect children with the perfect rooms is not achievable.

The perfect meals are not achievable.

The perfect job is not achievable.

The perfect life.

Do you hear me?

I don't want you to feel discouraged, instead I want you to feel encouraged because you can let go.

You can let go and allow yourself to have the bad moments because you know you'll be able to find something beautiful in the next one.

You need to let go and have as much grace for yourself as you do for others.

You won't always respond to your kids perfectly.

You won't always have the laundry done.

You won't always have the birthday gifts preplanned.

You won't always have extra to give to your partner.

You won't always have the kitchen cleaned with fresh muffins on the counter.

And that's okay.

You are not failing.

There is only one you and you only have so much energy to direct to each part of your life and you can't do it all at once. Even those who act like they can are breaking down inside and neglecting something- usually themselves.

This is where self care comes in. You must take the time to care for yourself. Fill up your cup and do what you need to do to get to a good place mentally. And I'm not talking like once a week, I'm talking you need to take a little time for yourself everyday or you will burn out.

You need to prioritize saying no to the things that don't bring you and your family joy.

You need to prioritize having fun, even if that means just putting on music while the whole family kicks out the laundry together.

You need to realize that if you get to the end of the day and you have accomplished absolutely nothing, you didn't fail. You didn't waste the day. You existed and your existence itself is a blessing.

You, you my love are not failing. You are existing.

Appreciate the hard days and the easy days, for they are both days that you got to live, breathe and exist.

Things will get better, they always do, just try to take care of yourself, okay? Reach out for help if you need it.

xoxo – Ry